Starting a new relationship is always a fun experience, since it represents a world of possibilities. However, how you approach the initial stages of any relationship will always affect its long term success. Most of the relationships that do not last long or lead to broken hearts usually turn out so on account of the fact that both parties did not take the initial part of the relationship seriously.
To ensure that you do not fall into this trap, there are a few things you should always avoid when starting a new relationship. Many times, you will find it very difficult to avoid them. However, this almost always leads to other issues in future, which is why you have to make an effort to do so. Some of these include:
- Pretending to be someone you are not
It is very tempting for anyone to pretend to be someone they are not so that they can gain the approval of the object of their desires. However, the problem with this approach is that it is only a matter of time before everything comes undone. If you truly fall in love with the other party and they find out that you have been lying to them, they are likely to think that everything else you said was a lie as well. This way, you will end up losing them even if all you wanted was their approval.
Being yourself during the initial stages of a relationship is important since it gives the other party a good idea of exactly who you are. Baring some of your weaknesses also shows that you are not afraid of having a few defects, and this makes you even more intriguing.
- Being too superficial with your communication
When you have just met someone for the first time, you should always hit the ground running when it comes to communication. Talking to them freely is always going to pay off since this will make them confident enough to do the same for you, and this in turn means that you are likely to have a more fulfilling relationship. Doing this also makes them open up to you, since it shows them that you can listen to them and are not afraid to talk to them.
- Doing things that seem too cliché
When you speak of the word ‘date’, most people immediately think of a restaurant, candlelit dinners, movies and the like. These are exactly the kinds of things you need to avoid if you are to show your date that you are fun. When you are organizing a date, you should do something unusual, and it should preferably involve some physical activity such as skating or even paintballing. This way ,you won’t get bored talking about each other, and it also gives you an opportunity to have a lot more fun. You are likely to look much more interesting when you take your date for such outings rather than the regular ones.
The same advice goes for virtually everything else in the relationship. For instance, when you decide to engage in sex, you should try out something different such as the use of toys and role playing to make it more interesting.
- Don’t always fawn over your newfound love
There are some people who obsess over people they have met and are going out with, such as by constantly calling and texting them. However, you need to remember that this may end up having the complete opposite of what you are aiming to achieve; you could just end up driving them away.
If you intend to be in a long term relationship, remember that you probably have a lot of time with each other in future. Being constantly on your partner’s case will only serve to make them less intriguing with time. If you don’t drive them away, you will get bored with them. To make your relationship last, always try and have a life of your own that does not always involve your partner.
- Not being on the same page
During the initial stages of your relationship, you should always try to make sure that the both of you are on the same page as far as possible. For instance, you could be interested in a short term fling, while your partner is set for a long term relationship. To avoid heartbreaks, always make sure that these issues are aired especially when it looks like the relationship is becoming more serious. This way, none of you will have to make an emotional investment when they don’t need to.